Change

Yesterday, someone said I looked like a designer. It was the most exciting compliment paid to me by a stranger in a long time. :)

The past couple of years have seen a change in me. Outwardly, and possibly inwardly. For the better or worse, I do not know. Financial independance, as a friend adequately mentioned last evening, 'is liberating'. Responsibility is now mine to behold, and no one will suffer excessively if I fail.

Brokeback Mountain

Just watched a heartwrenching Brokeback Mountain. Long, boring, slow-moving, say what you will- but I felt it was a captivating, and yet profoundly down-to-earth story. I wonder...if such an intense and passionate forbidden love were allowed to blossom freely, without the constraints of normality as deemed by society, or the backdrop of mundanity... would it be as poignant and beautiful as it were? Living, always with a vision of a more fulfilling idyllic life, ignoring circumstances, despite the knowledge of its impossibility. Tragic or so it seems, to have it shattered by death's wings without ever knowing what could have been. I suppose, it was the only kind of closure that made sense.

Amazing Race Asia!

One thing's sort of been... consuming my thoughts over the past few days. Eunice mentioned on Friday (and boy was it a mistake!), that the Amazing Race is taking applicants from Asia. I was fanatical about it for the next 48hrs. What a chance of a lifetime it would be, going on a trip like this! Although I'd always mentioned to Jason that we would fail an amazing race together (er..after losing our way N times in Taiwan), now that it comes to the crunch, there's nothing more I'm wishing for than to get into this race with him. (but well, such is life, it's ok dearie we'll go around the world in a relaxed manner one day yah?)
I reckon my friends are a more irrational bunch as compared to the general population. Poor Dale had most of his friends telling him that he was crazy, mad, or had nothing-better-to do. My dearest Ruffy, at least, would like to join me, but has normal-responsible-adult matters to consider.
Well, what is it about? What's the big deal about leaving work for a mere 5 weeks, i.e 0.2% of your entire working life to do.. something else? To get out of the stuffiness of the stale cubicle, experience the wind in your hair, the adrenaline rush through your veins, the breaking of cultural barriers, the loss of affectedness.
Oh, I'm dreaming.

What are we?

Who am I compared to Jesus? What are my pursuits, power, excellence or stature compared to His? I fix my eyes on Him; and realise that I become smaller, and smaller. Yes, He wants me to rise above mediocrity, however, my focus needs to be on living a life which pleases Him. That would be a life in which goodness is epitomised. For when all is said and done, does it matter what people will remember me for? They will also return to dust and ashes... In eternity, it is God who reigns, and thus it is only between me and Him.

To think that once upon a time, all He wanted was for us to behold love and joy in a plentiful garden. Why can't we reflect on the simplicity of that plan sometimes? I feel that it would make life a lot less complicated.

' "Look at the joy of this man," says Fisher. "He has just won the most important thing in his life: the opportunity to pass along his DNA." '
-Anthropologist Helen Fisher, on the scene of a joyous newlywed couple.

My first love.

It's 1hr and 13mins into Valentine's Day 2006. Was pondering that on my way home today... haven't spent a Valentine's Day in all of my 24years with a proper..er...human date. >.<
With the exception of my Lord... whom I'm going to spend later after work with. He's really the only one who's always there for me, whenever I need Him. What would I do with Him!

Trust in the Lord

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;...
Ps 37:5-7

Best Magazine Ever

I was enthralled to find this in the mail yesterday- my very first issue of National Geographic, subscribed. :)
Remember the times when I'd beg Dad for a subscription but would be declined as it was a "waste of money".
It is great to be financially independant.
(whilst remembering half of the world's population lives below the poverty line.)

Positive Pessimists

Mum and I decided, over lunch today, that we were both positive pessimists. We expect the worst in every situation, so as not to get too disappointed, but we try to remain cheerful about our circumstances.

Mum used to be a positive optimist. But ever since marriage, she's been dragged down by the huge figure of negative pessimism dad is.

And therefore, I am what I am.

But- I want all these to change. I don't want to continue living a life feeling mundane, lousy and useless. I believe that I will be able to achieve the many things that the Lord has planned for me, only if I am able to envision myself doing them. I cannot limit God in my life. When the land is flowing with milk and honey, but inhabited by aliens, I want to be like Joshua- full of faith- who'll say, "my God is much bigger than what is before me. Because of Him, I am well able!" I will go only as far as I see myself going! Since I am a child of the most high God, and I have His favour upon me, good things will happen to me. The going will not necessarily be easy... but it will be GOOD.

This will be a year of breakthrough. :)

Furries

It's been awhile since I've put up pictures of my furballs! :)


Tink, she loves to plonk herself on any item of clothing I leave on my bed. She's licking her belly here, and believe me, she really isn't as fat as she looks... >.<










Snuggly cuddly willowy tinky